Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Jokes Of the day

Aliens are sneaky!


An alien walks into a bar and sits next to a drunk guy and begins poking him in the shoulder.

The drunk guy just ignores him.

After a wile the guy turns to the alien and begins looking him up and down.

He notices that the alien has no genitalia.

He then asks "You guys have no genitalia, how do you guy have sex?"

The alien, still poking him in the arm, just smiles!


Student Report Cards

These are real comments made by teachers on their student report cards.

1. Since my last report, your child has hit rock bottom and has started to dig.

2. I would not allow this student to breed.

3. Your child has delusions of adequacy.

4. Your child is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.

5. Your son sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.

6. The student has a "full six-pack" but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together.

7. This child has been working with glue too much.

8. When your daughter's IQ reaches 50, she should sell.

9. The gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming.

10. If this student were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week.

11. It's impossible to believe the sperm that created this child beat out 1,000,000 others.

12. The wheel is turning but the hamster is dead

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